### Breaking News: Investigative Report Confirms "Girls Poop" – Biological Reality Prevails
**WASHINGTON D.C.** — In a revelation that has sent shockwaves through the basement-dwelling subcultures of the internet and challenged long-standing myths perpetuated by middle-school humor, a comprehensive investigation into human biology has definitively concluded that, yes, girls do indeed poop.
The report, which traces its intellectual origins to a high-intensity brainstorming session on the imageboard /pol/, marks a turning point in the discourse surrounding human physiological normalcy. For decades, the myth of the "delicate maiden who never engages in unsavory biological functions" has been a staple of romantic idealism and adolescent denial. However, objective reality has once again proven to be a stubborn, uncompromising force.
"We looked at the data, we consulted the experts, and we followed the science," said a lead researcher familiar with the inquiry. "Despite the desperate attempts by the 'princess-fantasy' industrial complex to maintain the illusion, the metabolic processes of the human body do not discriminate based on gender. Digestion is a universal requirement for life."
The findings, which were debated with the usual fervor and unfiltered skepticism characteristic of the /pol/ boards, have effectively dismantled the last vestige of the "girlish mystery" trope. The consensus from the thread was summarized by one user as "biology doesn't care about your feelings," a sentiment that has become a rallying cry for those tired of the social theater of polite deception.
Social commentators suggest that this revelation is part of a larger trend of discarding manufactured societal illusions in favor of fundamental truths. By accepting the base reality of the human condition, society moves one step closer to a state of transparent, grounded realism.
While some holdouts continue to cling to outdated notions of gendered biological exceptionalism, the scientific community remains firm. As the adage goes: truth is the ultimate goal, and in this instance, the truth is quite literally visceral.
The report concludes with a stern reminder: the human body is a machine, and machines require maintenance. Whether one is a man or a woman, the basic mechanics of survival remain the same. It is time to stop pretending otherwise.
