O Kristi, we hardly knew ye! Actually, that’s not true. We knew ye quite well, or at least better than we’d wish to. We didn’t have much choice. Mainly, because you were always in our grills withyour Mar-a-Lago face, whether in $220 million taxpayer-fundedsizzle reels, or inICE-Barbie-wear. Though I was personally partial to your cowgirl outfits, because I like a cabinet secretary who ain’t afraid to ride cowgirl. (That’s what Corey Lewandowski said!)

Like a third-degree facial burn, Noem was uncomfortably visible. She left her mark on the Department of Homeland Security (or a permanent scar, if you prefer), which is usually a relatively low-key post. Can anyone even name another DHS Secretary off the top of their head? Can you recall anything about Tom Ridge or Jeh Johnson? Probably not. But then, those guys didn’t wear saucy cowgirl get-ups (at least not on the clock). Or purchase two Gulfstream G700 private jets for $200 million on the public’s dime, complete with luxe master bedroom for mile-high “meetings.” Or write memoirs proudly featuring anecdotes about shooting their puppy in cold blood in a gravel pit as proof that they can make those tough leadership choices. Or hold press conferences defending their troops gunning down protesters in the street, as if human beings were untrainable wirehair pointers or something. (RIP, Cricket, and Renée Good, and Alex Pretti.)

This week, after Noem became the first Trump cabinet official to get fired in his second term (you have to be a pretty rancid pollutant to get tossed from this cesspool), there are already lots of troubling questions about her named successor, Oklahoma Senator Markwayne Mullin, a man whose first name can’t make up its mind. A man who I have uncharitably called “the dumbest member of the Senate” in the past. (Which is not to slight Ron Johnson and Tommy Tuberville, who always provide stiff competition.) There are troubling questions like:

1. Will Markwayne ever get his two first names legally separated, since theyremind everybodythat he isa ridiculous personwho sounds like an extra inTalladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby?

2. Will Markwayne have to sleep with Corey Lewandowski? Is that a DHS job requirement?

3. If yes, can he do so under Kristi’s security blankie, the one that got thatmilitary pilot fired? Or does she get to take that with her to her new post as Plenopotentiary Sneeze-Guardian Of The Hemispheric Salad Bar Of Liberty, or whateverBS titleTrump just handed her as a now-go-play-in-the-road parting gift.

But though I’ve already mentioned several lowlights of her tenure, I don’t wish to inflict some comprehensive review. Which would be an unnecessary exercise. Because one of the beautiful things about the Trump administration (perhaps the only one?) is that you never have to get bogged down in the particulars of the old corruption, because new corruption reliably presents itself each and every week.

Though I often find it unintentionally hilarious when, after Trump finally throws someone over — in Noem’s case, after several hundred violations of ethics and/or good taste — and it’s safe to condemn one of their own, MAGAbots tend to jump on a weakened member of the herd with both hooves, practically salivating for a good culling, as if they knew this person needed eliminated all along on faulty character grounds.

When a Trumpster relative of mine heard the news of Noem’s defenestration — a relative with unimpeachable personal morals, but who has made excuses for Trump for everything from his multiple affairs, including with a porn star (“let he who is without sin…”) to invading the Capitol while pretending an election was stolen (“why didn’t Nancy Pelosi call for security?”) — he told me, “You need to take her to the front of the Capitol and stone her.” Oh, okay. Never heard him speak like that about Noem when she was say, accusing Alex Pretti of domestic terrorism before his dead body even cooled.

And then there wasFox’s Laura Ingraham, whoconsistently defendedNoem when she was pilloried by critics, but who is now demanding to know, “Why didn’t {Trump} fire her right away?”

Source: Drudge Report